Controlling Your Thoughts

“Thoughts and words are living things that go out into the universe and reproduce after their own kind. It has been proven that you will have or become what you constantly say or think about. This is called the “Law of Attraction.” (I’m not going to write about that here, but you can research it on the Internet.) Also, the Bible tells us that we reap what we sow, which is the same principle. If you focus on your sadness, it will bring about more sadness. If you focus on changing your life and having a better future, your life will change, and you will have a better future.”

“Minimize or eliminate being around negative people. People who are depressed, who complain a lot, who always talk about their problems or gossip will only make you feel worse. Don’t let others dump their negativity on you. You have a new life to build, so don’t let them tear it down. You can politely tell people something like “You know, I have a lot going on right now, and I’d rather talk about more positive things.” Or you can politely change the
subject to something more positive.” 

Visit www.grief2joy.com to learn more.  I look forward to getting to know about you and your child.

Love, Jacqui Nock

Forgiveness

Sometimes the most difficult people to forgive are ourselves. "If only" hounds us, robbing us of peace and piling on the guilt. We carry around 1,001 hurts and bear so many grudges, filling us with bitterness. Oh, to be cleansed and freed — to forgive and be forgiven! (from CBN.com.) For more on forgiveness, visit http://www.grief2joy.com/view/nl-lesson-8--guilt-blame-forgiving.aspx.

Jacqui

Departing With Your Child's Possessions

Dealing with the death of your child is a sensitive subject, so who better to take advice from than someone who has experienced the same loss and understands. Everything you’re going through I have been through, and we will both continue on this journey of recovery together for the rest of our lives. That is why I created www.grief2joy.com.  I want to help other bereaved parents like myself to create a new life of joy and happiness. I know it seems impossible, and it even feels strange for me to write those words, but it is possible. We will never get over losing our babies (no matter what their age), but we can learn to live again. Please enjoy this excerpt from one of the lessons at www.grief2joy.com.

“There is going to come a time when you will have to clean out your child’s room or give away their possessions. This time will come sooner for some and later for others. Don’t let anyone pressure you into doing this until you are ready. You might have a situation where your child was married, living alone, or living with a roommate, and their spouse or friends might want to do this for you if it is too difficult for you. Either way, you as the parent should have the option to go through your child’s possessions first and decide what you want to do with them. No one, not even your child’s spouse, is closer to your child than you are.”

“Giving away your child’s possessions doesn’t have to be a sad time. It can be a sweet time of remembrance and reminiscing. Don’t keep everything for yourself. Give some memories to your child’s siblings, relatives, friends, spouse, children, and co-workers. Here are some ways you can create memories for you and others who loved your child…”

Visit www.grief2joy.com to learn more.  I look forward to getting to know about you and your child.

Love, Jacqui 
Dawn's Mom

Love, Not Hate

Road rage. domestic violence, hurtful words, and emotional outbursts. All of these remind us that many people carry around an enormous amount of anger. When we feel we have been wronged, how can we deal with the resulting anger in a way that does not harm others? The answer is found in God's Word:

Don't copy the behavior and customs of this world, but let God transform you into a new person by changing the way you think. Don't just pretend that you love others. Really love them. Hate what is wrong. Stand on the side of the good. Love each other with genuine affection, and take delight in honoring each other.

Be glad for all God is planning for you. Be patient in trouble, and always be prayerful. When God's children are in need, be the one to help them out.

If people persecute you because you are a Christian, don't curse them; pray that God will bless them. When others are happy, be happy with them. If they are sad, share their sorrow. Live in harmony with each other. Don't try to act important, but enjoy the company of ordinary people. And don't think you know it all!

Never pay back evil for evil to anyone. Do things in such a way that everyone can see you are honorable. Do your part to live in peace with everyone, as much as possible. Romans (12:2, 9-18)

I hope these words are helpful to you.

Love, Jacqui

Power of Prayer

Use the power of your prayer and meditation, as this will help you see things from a new perspective and to also know what seems to be unraveling. Finding balance during these times will help to pave the extremes of yesterday. Stay strong and trust that there is more that is going on than meets the eye. These are the times you have been waiting for and see them as the opportunities to change your life.  (Taken from beliefnet.com.) Find more about prayer at www.grief2joy.com. 

Jacqui

Diversity and Racism

I have a very diverse group of friends. I have friends who are Asian, African, and East Indian, and even homosexual. I just like people for who they are. I am African-American, and my best friend is a white lady who is 12 years younger than I am. We are always talking about black and white racial stereotypes to each other, and we actually laugh about them. The other day we were talking, and I asked her "why do white people love to do dangerous things like skydiving, bungee jumping, and mountain climbing?" She said to me "because black people are always being chased by the police, but white people have to create their own excitement." We are very open about racial stereotypes, and we have a good time with it. Just felt like sharing that. Don't forget to visit my web site-www.grief2joy.com.

Jacqui

Talking to Kids about Death

Do not be afraid to talk about death with children. Kids are smart, and will realize that things have changed. Be honest concerning your feelings as well. Explain to children what will happen at the funeral or memorial service, and answer their questions the best you can. Children of different ages grieve in different ways. Explain things to them in an age appropriate manner. Assure children that they are not going to die and that no one else is going to die because this person died. Make sure children know that they didn’t in any way cause this death to happen. If a child is having problems dealing with a death, see a therapist who specializes in dealing with children and grief. Don’t wait to see how it goes; make an appointment right away.

For more tips on how to deal with children and grief, visit www.grief2joy.com.